Down In A Gulp
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Detoxification
My skin has been flaring up lately. I have been falling sick easily. Too much toxin (all the Johnnie Walker perhaps? *grin*). I think I have almost found a solution to my acne problem and it is something internal. Too much shit in the blood, parasites, liver blockage... few possibilities. Anywayz, I am falling sick easily so it's gotta be something internal. I braved myself to drink oil and juice.

So I decided to do bowel and parasite cleansing. It is easy and you gotta stay at home the entire day just to standby. Drink half a glass of castor oil and orange juice the night before. Stomach will start acting up around 6 something in the morning and that is when the excessive purging starts.

To replenish the loss of electrolytes during the purging, drink and eat the 'meat' of a young coconut. This would prevent nausea and dizziness.

It's half day and I think I am done with the excessive squirting of liquid but I don't feel hungry at all. Have been having glasses of water throughout the day.

I hope this would solve my problem by removing all the toxin buildup in the blood and colon. I should do this every week after drinks. It is like resetting the PC to release clogged up memory that causes the slowdown in the PC.

Yea, purging is good for the anus!

Side note: Went to the much raved about Maison, nice rustic design but music is just bleh. Headed over to Loft and crowd was better. But I had a very bad sinus allergy, sneezing the night away. I guess must be the big herd of uncles flooding the place. Yes, they were everywhere and it was so obvious that they were on the prowl! I mean like what else were they thinking standing on the raised platform with drinks in their hands , looking around. They were not talking to their friends but concentrating on the crowd. Hunting for fresh meat!
BTW Heroes the series is awesome. Same type of awesomeness I found when watching Prison Break.
posted by DaphStar* @ 9:00 PM   2 comments
Saturday, January 27, 2007
Take control , be a monk
Was reading digg.com and this article caught me eye. A Mormon's guide to Masturbation. HAH! Now that's eye catching. This is not something made up and it is true , like commandments engraved onto stone tablets.

So here are the selected Mormon's guide to self control:-
And my thoughts to the guide.

1. Never touch the intimate parts of your body except during normal toilet processes.
Can you get aroused in a toilet??? Like a kopitiam toilet??

2.
Avoid being alone as much as possible. Find good company and stay in this good company.
But a guy and a guy can't go to the toilet together and make sure that the other won't jerk off!

3.
If you are associated with other persons having this same problem, YOU MUST BREAK OFF THEIR FRIENDSHIP. Never associate with other people having the same weakness.
Wah lau ehh, you will be a very lonely person to follow this commandments of self control.

4.
When you bathe, do not admire yourself in a mirror. Never stay in the bath more than five or six minutes -- just long enough to bathe and dry and dress AND THEN GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM into a room where you will have some member of your family present.
Err, do you give a name to your ding dong and talk to it using the mirror? Its like playing a ventriloquist with your ding dong.

5. Avoid people, situations, pictures or reading materials that might create sexual excitement.
Yes, avoid porn. But you can't avoid a girl with a micro mini skirt, showing off a little butt cheek, walking around the club rite. That little bit of the beginning of the butt cheek curve creates sexual excitement too.

6.
It is sometimes helpful to have a physical object to use in overcoming this problem. A Book of Mormon, firmly held in hand, even in bed at night has proven helpful in extreme cases.
Kekekeke, ROTFL, can sprinkling holy water all over help?

7.
If the temptation seems overpowering while you are in bed, GET OUT OF BED AND GO INTO THE KITCHEN AND FIX YOURSELF A SNACK.
Or drive yourself to the nearest Mamak for a good helping of roti. OR, drive yourself to the nearest 'Chau Ah Kua' nest. You will never fantasize about girls for that night.

8.
Put wholesome thoughts into your mind at all times. Read good books.
Hmm... true, read something less stressful.

9.
Pray. But when you pray, don't pray about this problem, for that will tend to keep [it] in your mind more than ever
ROTFL. Don't pray about this problem? They really thought about everything possible.

10.
In very severe cases it may be necessary to tie a hand to the bed frame with a tie in order that the habit of masturbating in a semi-sleep condition can be broken. This can also be accomplished by wearing several layers of clothing which would be difficult to remove while half asleep.
This is my FAV! Tie a hand to the bed frame? ROTFLMAO!! So if you have the urge, cuff yourself.
posted by DaphStar* @ 12:28 AM   0 comments
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Line Dance Troupe
Photos were totally unsatisfactory. Look! bad color and brightness balance. Aih, all the need for someone with an SLR to come shoot for events like these. Leave it to the point and shoot users, this is the outcome.The ad hoc troupe that I put together which didn't turn out too bad after all. Everybody was very cooperative and supportive. So glad that I found these people.

Part of the dance troupe with my see fu in the middle.

HillBillies, The Agogoers, The Hip Hop wannabes, and Lightning Kids.

Moral of the event: Buy a CANON camera plsss! Don't get conned by Leica Lumix Pana-ass-onic or Carl Zeiss Sony Cybershot cos they ain't cameras!
posted by DaphStar* @ 7:35 AM   2 comments
Thursday, January 18, 2007
MCA Line Dance Extravaganza
This was what I have been working my ass off for the past 2 months. Been so tired and haggard for this Klang MCA Line Dance performance. Datuk Ng Yen Yen and Datin Chew Mei Fun graced the event as well. It was a really big deal performing in front of them as well as they actually inquired about our ad hoc dance team..HAHAH. I shall be putting the performance video up soon. This was my outfit for the performance.


I love my red top!

Why is this picture here? This is a 42 yr old married woman who dressed up like a hooker to the party. Midriff baring red tube top, and micro mini skirt made her the laughing stock of the night.( at least I guffawed) She doesn't have any respect for herself or the Datuks and Datins present. Well, I actually fought with her cos damn TULAN! Anywayz, her boobs are fake as well. Lelong Lelong, she does sucky sucky only for 10 dollar only! Or 60 dollar a night only!
posted by DaphStar* @ 9:22 AM   2 comments
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
APIIT Female Student commiting 'crime'
And so, I was driving my big green apple along Technology Park when a girl waiting by the street side caught me eye. Yea, she's gotta be a hot girl with long flowing hair, hot body even with plain white tee and jeans. But no!!! I couldn't see her face cause it was buried somewhere in her arm. And guess what she was doing...to my horror and disgust, she was intensely digging her armpit for maybe an ingrown hair! I mean like digging your armpit in front of APIIT!? She was practically raising her left arm high in the air, and right hand picking the armpit,and her face was buried in the armpit. Is that what APIIT teaches you, do whatever that pleases you and not care about the rest of the world? If I had a camera, I would just drive up to her and steal a shot and drive off laughing hysterically.
I went OMG for half a kilometer. Still can't shake that image off my head.
posted by DaphStar* @ 7:18 AM   3 comments
The resounding tune
Every now and then you will get a tune that will reverberate throughout the entire day or week or months in your head. It has gotta be something catchy, something annoying and something that you can see in everything. Well say like when it rains, the tune of Tata Young's El Nin YO! will resound. I need Rain! Rain ! Rain!, I'm burning up in here.... You Got my temperate rising Like El Nin YO! OMG sometimes it gets into your bones but it makes you wanna dance like a dog on heats to that tune. Like when Xavy asks me "guess what tune is in my head", my reply is "OMG ,You Got my Temperature Rising LIke El Nin YO!". It just takes someone to plant a tune in your head and that is it for the entire day.



See see, it finds a way to get into your brain one way or another like maggot finding a carcass. Xavy this is for you.

Just like how I plant the Smack That tune in everyone's head. Smack That all on the floor, SMack That Gimme Some More, SMack That till you get Sore! Aiyo,why does he like smacking like a teacher (who will make you bend over first).
posted by DaphStar* @ 6:09 AM   3 comments
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Of Compact Mirrors and Shavers


And so, what is the deal with compact mirrors and quad blade razors you may ask. I will be preaching of compact mirrors and shavers and what to do with it. However, here is the caveat, I ermm don't really walk the talk. You shall know why.
You see, when you have a compact mirror and a razor the first thing that comes to anyone's mind is shaving of the hair on the upper lip. However, I highly doubt any guy would own a compact mirror EXCEPT for handful.
The compact mirror and razor, when paired can be used in ways you never imagined can be used.

When we mention shaving, many a time is removing hair in obvious places or embarrassingly obvious places.
But somehow, China women from a certain region thinks that excessive amount of hair at the obvious spots are rather sexy and maybe more erotic??

Going down south is a rather private practice that only your partner will know. Some request that their partner have it squeaky clean but others just can't be bothered about what is going on down south. Let if rot and be infested with fleas. There is even an intimate trimmer by Jenna Jameson which comes with interchangeable heads and 10 bikini hair designs!

The legendary Jenna Jameson and her HAWT Trimmer.

10 design stencils that will guarantee extra eroticness.

However, there is another intimate area that many overlook to shave. Let me illustrate on how the compact mirror and shaver can work really well for this.

Yes, the shaving of the other intimate area. Hair that sprouts out from the poo poo opening. I shall leave it to your imagination as to why that area HAS gotta be shaved. Just squat, mirror and razor.


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posted by DaphStar* @ 3:55 AM   2 comments
Tuesday, January 9, 2007
Thriller Killer Moves
So, I was watching Michael Jackson's Thriller video and still think it's the best music video ever. Then I realized Wade Robson's Sexy Back actually stole some zombie moves from the video. It is really cool how Wade Robson choreographed the dance and I got myself into poo poo by teaching and performing that exact dance.OMG the pain of going through figuring out what the heck is he doing half of the time almost killed me and to think of performing it in heels, wow, good riddance to me.

I was in awe in front of my PC watching Thriller until I came across this. It's not Michael Jackson but Mikail Jakunsamy! I almost ROTFLMAO when I saw this. Priceless and Timeless!

posted by DaphStar* @ 1:45 AM   2 comments
Sunday, January 7, 2007
The Velvet Experience
This is my first clubbing posting. I don't normally rave about clubbing experiences unless it is super awesome and this time around Velvet on Saturday night with all my good buddies was over flowing with Awesomeness. Alicia's family was there, Yu May's Family was there, Kiat Ee, all my colleagues (meaning all the Account Managers cos we are the only happening bunch in Cordoda). And, I managed to bump into a couple of old friends that I knew did not recognize me but sorta guess it is me.
You know, idiot people like that who will just keep guessing is it her is it not her for the entire night and not try to actually ask.
Me being a little bolder after drinks went up to them thanks to my colleague who knows them and they actually did not recognize me but after introducing myself, the realization hit them like a coconut slamming into their head.

Anywayzz clubbing is always fun with the right company. Anything can be fun with the right company for that matter.
It was my first time to down from a bottle. That's not my forte and it gave me quite a kick!This is really downing a gulp at a divine level.
Somehow the DJ in Velvet spins the best music in town. A mixture of latest R&B and old school hip hop ( I like!).
As usual, I was singing to every song. Somehow, I don't know how but I just know the lyrics to every song.

Some pics of the eventful night. Friends are fun, guys who pick you up at club are just losers.

Kitty and Yu May , both whom are my ex housemates at ISU. Kitty was blinded by the chicks at the dance floor. Too hot for him.

Yu May's bro and Kitty recovering from his temporal blindness. Never buy a Sony Cybershot. Bad focusing.

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posted by DaphStar* @ 3:37 AM   4 comments
Thursday, January 4, 2007
The celebrity in you!
Came across this interesting website today. Was spending a lot of time on it.

Cognition Robot

Yea man, you upload a photo, detects your face ON the photo, and scans through their celebrity database to match your face. It has the most amazing face detection graphics. I mean it is not super awesome, but awesome enough to make you think that it is a real life robot scanning your face to find a match.I found out that I look like many celebrities, some whom I have no idea who they are. Anywayzz, these are my results.
My photo. Yea, every girl has her photo taken by Estee Lauder at some point in their life.
Put it through the cognition machine, scan scan...scan scan...WALA!
HAhaha...I look like Sammi Cheng, feel like crying, tears of joy.
So, I can't believe that I look like Sammi Cheng, I decided to put another photo through the Cognito Robot.
Delta who??!!! Anyway...last try..some random photo

And it turned out to be......

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posted by DaphStar* @ 6:37 AM   3 comments
Monday, January 1, 2007
Good Times, Shitty Times in Ames Part 2
This is a toilet shot. The very small and creepy toilet (pretty much like in the movie Psycho).
Ahh...my first apartment with all the flicked furnitures from the garbage. See the bottles, the beginning of my gulping career. Yes we love Mac and back then the latest was OS9.
Hah! My storeroom/bedroom. It is so small it's not funny.
yea, the bed. Have been using the sleeping bag as my blanket. See, I'm just sleeping next to the heater, so sometimes if I accidentally touch it in the middle of the night, I'll just jump off my bed. Good thing is it's very NAIICE during winter.
Oh yea and how can I forget the good times and shitty times of snow. Yea its great after a snow storm but shitty when it starts to melt and freezes again. I was skating myself to classes most of the time.

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posted by DaphStar* @ 8:16 AM   0 comments
Good Times, Shitty Times in Ames
Was going through some old pictures in Ames and found a few outstanding pictures that I think I have a story to tell.

My first taste of Iowa's life is a visit to the apple farm. Now I know where apples come from and how a freaking apple tree looks like. That's me, posing with a poison apple not wearing a really think sweater not knowing wind chill is about 10 degrees.
Then I came across this very 'gay' picture. The one in front was my then boyfriend and the other gay guy embracing him from the back is his supposed best friend. I find this picture very, erm loving for 2 straight guys. I guess they never expected this picture to leak out.
This is what we normally have for dinner during my first 2 semesters. See, there isn't even a proper dining table. Yea, we lived like a pauper. It is just a box wrapped with the CyRide bus schedule. Checkout the dishes, pork n potatoes, dried prawns , and fried iceberg lettuce. Silverware compliments from our very own student dining hall(yea, we flicked anything we can get our hands on).
This is how we celebrate CNYs. Pot Luck. Some shitty food but at least it is Chinese food. I sure miss my 'family'.

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posted by DaphStar* @ 7:49 AM   2 comments
What is with the color?
Ok not very much of a cam whore cos I haven't got my freaking Canon Powershot SD 700 IS . Definitely a kick ass cam that I wanna get my hands on. Have always been a fan of the ASS series of PowerShot. Ask any expert about a good point and shoot cam and they will tell you Canon. Still somehow after ISO 400 it has a lot of noise which is the only concern I have. It should be better with the anti-shake feature. But I guess the reason why the don't want too much noise reduction is to preserve the little details in the picture. Well, at least there is a valid reason for the noise in high ISO pictures. Anyways some pictures with a Sony DSC T-something cam.

I don't know why but we do have telepathic minds because we always end up wearing the same color code. This was taken at the awesome SkyBar.

Somehow I look fat in this picture. Well I guess it is just universal to wear black on a girl's night out. I think it is more flattering to blend in with the darkness of the night. Maybe that is what Yu May was thinking as well.

This was on Christmas day and white should be the dress code on a holy day. And we did it again! Both of us in white!

Another picture with the delicious deco of Mid Valley. Just realized the candy stick with a cookie at the end looks somewhat kinky. I don't know, may be my great twisted mind for seeing things in a different way or the artist is just oblivious of his/her design. What say you?

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posted by DaphStar* @ 5:23 AM   1 comments
 
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