Down In A Gulp: January 2008

Down In A Gulp

Friday, January 11, 2008

The BJ Lips

Updated 12th January:
According to Madam Zorra in the Face Fortune column, the Lips are the most sensual feature on the face. It can send love messages in the most subtle and tantalising of ways. Do you know that when you are ovulating your lips grow redder and fuller? Lips send sexual signals. Nothing drives a man's temperature up like a woman running the tip of her tongue over her opened mouth.
I didn't know that lips grow redder and fuller when ovulating. I shall take note of my calendar and how my lips respond during that period of time. This is an interesting myth! I guess I shall start selling cayenne pepper infused lipstick.

Don't ask me why full, luscious, pouty lips are termed BJ lips. Girls with full lips are better kissers ? Perhaps its the wider area of contact that makes kissing a person with full lips more passionate and intense? Or its that just-made-out lips that makes you desire the person to kiss you all over???

To me, girls with such full pouty lips are a rarity, like a diamond in the rough, like a hot girl who's still a virgin at 30.

Long gone are the days where thin lips are desirable. These days, girls are going for lip collagen injections, silicone fillers and artificial lip plumpers to get the Angelina Jolie or Amber Chia lips effect. Make up artists are going for the full lips effect by using all sorts of shading , lining and glossing the lips.

I've been doing some research on lip plumper products are most of it are not readily available in the Malaysian market. I guess the Asian men are not that demanding YET! Most of these lip plumping products works by increasing the blood circulation of the lips thus increasing the lip size (swelling it in other words). Natural ingredients such as cinnamon and ginger are used to sting the lips, hence bee-stung lips. According to reviews, after application, the lips will sting quite a fair bit in order for it to swell. Well, no pain no gain and the pain is worth the plumpness.

I have deduced that since stinging of the lips would give that plumping effect, there are tonnes of foodstuff out there that would sting the lips! Try rubbing curry powder or Tobasco sauce all over the lips and I'll guarantee you that you can actually feel the blood circulation increase by 2 folds. Before you know it, your lips are stung to the size of Angelina Jolie's. Mariah Carey rubs on pure peppermint extract onto her lips to get that plumping effect. There are others who claims that rubbing Cayenne pepper on the lips would not only plump it but give the lips natural redness.

My take on it?? Why not rub some whiskey on your lips. I can tell you that you will feel the instant pouty, plumping effect on the lips. It works so effectively to the extend that your upper and lower lips can't touch when you close your mouth. Now that is really super pouty lips! Look at Angelina Jolie and Amber Chia, their upper and bottom lips do not touch when their mouth are closed.

After the whiskey has taken effect on the lips, apply your favorite gloss and you are for sure to get compliments the entire day or night. Whiskey, the happy liquid that doubles up as a beauty secret.

P/S: Guys with pouty, thick lips are utterly disgusting and unattractive. They may think its a God given feature but I can tell you its a stinky feature that irks most girl. I for one simply abhor men with big lips.

Labels: Beauty

posted by DaphStar* @ 7:07 AM 37 comments

Sunday, January 6, 2008

CFM Shoes

Guys, you need to learn this, CFM shoes. When your girl tells you she's wearing her CFM shoes she means " I want you to desire me ONLY in this pair of shoes, nothing else". Yea, its the Come Fu*k Me shoes that is the only article on the body that doesn't come off when the two of you embark into ecstasy.

So how exactly does CFM shoes look like. Well, its gotta be stilletoes , 2 and half or 3 inches, depending on whether the wearer is able to strut properly in it. Super high heels elongates the legs and long legs are sexy especially in a teeny tiny dress. Then of course, there are little details that makes it a CFM sandals instead of a mere high heel sandals is the chain detail. Chains are somehow linked to SM (Sado Ma@@$@#$# crap) which would make any high heel a real CFM shoe. Super strappy sandals are also very CFM. Check out the shoe below and the first thing that comes to your mind .... SM! Shoes like these are not meant to be removed easily and the girl is supposed to keep it on the entire time!

For the girls, only wear CFM shoes when you are out with your guy or someone you plan to flirt with. Shoes like these can sure get you into trouble especially when paired with a dress or teeny tiny skirts. Unless you are planning to get laid on your night out, wear the CFM shoes with extreme discretion!

Labels: Offbeat

posted by DaphStar* @ 7:32 AM 11 comments

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